Not Always Right

[Urban Bucket]

I blame the soon to be posted really dippy conversation on Midge... well, at least the fact that I was reading said conversation on this website called, "Not Always Right"

notalwaysright.com/

Sadly, having worked in customer service for several years, I've seen a lot of dippy things said and done. However, I'm afraid this tops it all....

Again, blame Midge...



The dip will now be posted...

Because Aramaic Is Sooo Last Millenium
Video Rental | Nashville, TN, USA

Me: “Hi, can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah. I rented this movie, and ya’ll gave me the wrong one. This one has subtitles, and I wanted it in English.”

Me: “Sorry, sir. But Passion of The Christ is supposed to be in subtitles. It’s the way Mel Gibson made it.”

Customer: “Ya gotta be kiddin’ me! Why would he do somethin’ stupid like that?”

Me: “Well, I’m guess he just wanted to be true to its roots.”

Customer: “The idiot. Everyone knows the Bible is in English!”

Me: “…”

Customer: “So, can you fix it or what?”

Me: “Fix it? What do you mean?”

Customer: “Call up that Gibson feller and tell him to send you guys the English version!”

[Mehtharon Alimysa]

I like the second one.

[Urban Bucket]

This one? If so, yeah, I like it too

Pointless Paranoia, Meet Pistol Packin’
Movie Theater | Rochester, NY, USA
(A young man asks for a ticket for an R-rated movie and hands me his ID. I’m about to sell him the ticket when the lady behind him speaks up.)

Lady: “Wait! That picture in the ID doesn’t look like him at all!”

(I look at the ID. It appears he’s been sick since the photo was taken, but it’s clearly the same guy.)

Me: “Well, ma’am, I’m fairly certain that this is the correct ID. Now, if you’d just step up–”

Lady: “No! You can’t sell to someone with a fake ID. He could be a terrorist, for God’s sake! You should call the police!”

Me: “Ma’am, that is definitely not necessary. I am responsible for checking identification, and I–”

Lady: “I need to talk to your manager!”

(I begin to respond, but the guy politely waves me off and turns to the woman.)

Man: “Miss, I have another photo ID here, with a more recent picture. Do you think this matches?”

(He pulls a card out of his wallet and hands it to her. She goes completely white.)

Lady: “Well… um… yes, that’s, uh, fine!”

(She squirms for a moment, then exclaims, “I’ll be right back!” She drops the card and leaves the theater in a hurry. I give the guy his ticket.)

Me: “What was that you showed her?”

Man: “Oh, my handgun permit.”

[Urban Bucket]

Ok, out of all I've read so far, I think this has to be the top one!


The Child May Get A Himself Complex
Retail | Eugene, OR, USA
(I was working at the registers as a lady walked in with a child in a stroller. One of the other employees walked up to her.)

Employee: “Aw, what a cute baby. What’s his name?”

Customer: “God.”

Employee: “You named the kid after God?”

Customer: “No, I named him God.”


OMG!

[Urban Bucket]

The Force Is Strong In This One
Electronics Store | Canada
Customer: “Hello, I would like to return this item.”

Me: “Ok, what was the problem?”

Customer: “I just don’t need it anymore.”

Me: “Ok, do you have the receipt?”

Customer: “Yes, here it is.”

Me: “I’m sorry, I can’t return this. It’s from six months ago.”

Customer: “Yes you can…” *waves hands in the air*

Me: “I’m sorry, no I can’t. I would get in a lot of trouble.”

Customer: “No you won’t…” *waves hands in the air again*

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I’m not going to do that.”

Customer: *turns and leaves*

Me, to coworker: “Did I just get Jedi mind-tricked?”